pretty lame

I have been pretty bad at blogging since thanksgiving...sorry? I am not sure who exactly i was apologizing to there....
Things have been...interesting. The past three weeks have probably been some of the most difficult of my life thus far, i am just trying to figure crap out about a mission, school, family stuff, boys etc Its funny, the only thing that i figured out really is something that i felt i already new before, I want to be a teacher. That is important to me. I guess i have always thought about it more as a means to an end sort of thing, i was doing it so i could be a librarian. This week i had a conversation with one of my teachers, she told me i needed to become more emotionally invested in my education this is so selfish but i hadn't realized what the impact of my apathy would be, i know that if i don't start caring a lot more i am going to end up being one of those english teachers that everyone mocks and tries to transfer out of their class. That is frightening to me.
well two more weeks that is all i think i can do it, it will be rough but i can.