uhhh ok

i have a lot of feelings right now so bear with me

today was great i woke up to DAVID!!!!!! CALLING ME FROM TAIWAN!!!!!!!!! it made me sooooo freaking happy i love hearing him gosh i miss that kid it was funny cause last night i was thinking about how much i miss him and just remembering some good times etc. and then he called and it made me so happy. also i got an awesome score on my english test so that made me really happy as well. this evening we had our theater and literature board meeting which went well and afterwards the poetry workshop that taylor is doing every week met so me and megan went to that and i wrote something there and had to share it it was a different experience, i have written quite an amount of poetry in the past couple of months but i generally don't share it because i feel like it exposes me too much, like people will have too much power overme if i let them see me that closley so sharing was quite a tramatic experience for me and i almost cried not because of what i wrote but more because i was so scared of what their reactions would be because jacob and miles were there and megan i don't know it just made me so nervous. so that was cool afterwards i went to megan's and me and her and tricia watched so i married an ax murderer and ate pizza which was fun. ok


so i have been having trouble crying. i know that sounds weird but like usually i cry about twice a week like a good long cry just to release everything and i always feel so much better but i haven't done that for over a month and i want to so badly like last night i cried a little bit but stupid tears would only come out of one eye WHAT THE CRAP!?!!??!?! i don't understand and i just want to cry long and hard maybe when i get home,

so kilean is dating this guy named collin he is awesome and tonight he called me and was like did she have fun and all this stuff it was really funny and then he was like me and you should go on a road trip and i was like uhhh ok random. and he said you just seem like a fun person to go on a road trip with uhhh ok. we have a galley date at lunch tomorrow so that should be fun anyhow yeah i am going to bed cause i am exhausted here is wishing you all a fantastic valentines day